EU Commission

even though this has been around for awhile I thought you might just get a kick
out of it......hope you find it as funny as I did......

The EU Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the
official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other
possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan
that would become known as 'Euro-English'

In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the
sivil servants jump with joy.The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This
should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome
'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like 'fotograf' 20%
shorter

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach
the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.Governments will enkourage
the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate
speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is
disgrasful and it should go away

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z'
and 'w' with 'v'.

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor
trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem
of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst
plas.